Shana's Top 5 Remedies For Dealing with This Journey

I felt inspired the other night in spinning class with my sweat dripping, energy pumping, legs burning, and endorphins kicking. I think exercising can do that to you. I realized that there are certain things that have helped me cope with this season in my life and has made getting through the day just a little better.

1. Quality Time with God

2. Exercise

3. Communication

4. Enjoy Life

5. Support

1. Of course we know that quality time in the Word and praying is our #1 source for complete joy and peace in our hearts. No one and nothing else can do that. When I make the effort to give my thoughts, emotions, feelings over to God, He gives peace that is beyond my knowledge. And I need that because, on my own, I can't do it. And lately the WAITING for me has gotten harder. And I have to admit, I'm not great at doing this. I know in my heart that coming before God each morning is what I NEED to do, but a lot of times I don't. It is a constant challenge, but wonderful when I do. "The peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:7

2. Exercise as we know does amazing things for our bodies, our hearts, our energy level, and our minds. I got my degree in Exercise Science, worked as an aerobics coordinator, taught classes, and personal trained...yet sadly I have been in and out of the gym for the past couple of years. Once I quit working in the fitness industry after 8 years I have slacked on my own health. I lost my drive and passion I once had for health and fitness. My excuses consisted of..."I don't want to over do it, what if I'm pregnant, I just had an IUI so I probably shouldn't, I'm too sad to go so what's the point, or I don't want to take any chances." (Even though, through a weekend certification I took on Exercise and Pregnancy, I know exercise is great for pregnancy and has so many wonderful benefits, I don't think any research has been done on Exercise and Infertility so that's why RE's seem to say don't exercise or keep it light). Many pounds later I have found myself eating bad, inactive, and therefore not happy with body or myself (and turning 30 hasn't helped). That, on top of infertility, or maybe it's infertility on top of that has only made things harder. I have hated that fact that I used to love exercise yet have let myself go these past few years. Though.....recently, I don't know what exactly pushed my button, but these past five weeks I have finally gotten back into it and have been consistent AND I ENJOY IT AGAIN!!!! I am so excited I have that passion back, I feel like I'm myself again when I do. I feel energized, it starts my day right, and I even hate to miss because I enjoy it that much. Even if you are in the process of an IUI, In vitro, or just trying on your own, unless your doctor says otherwise, by getting at least a little exercise in by a nice walk in your neighborhood several days a week can do wonders. I had a professor in college, great Christian man, tell the class that he puts God first, fitness/health second, and family third. He says that in order to be a great husband and father he needs to be healthy and take care of his body. And I believe the same. We HAVE to take care of ourselves AND it just feels so good!!! And exercise for sure helps with depression.

3. Communicating with our husbands is also so important. Even though they may not quit understand what we are going through, we have to keep them informed on what's going on in our minds. Sharing with them our feelings, sadness, fears, and desires. When we keep it all inside, Satan can work wonders at turning our thoughts into ungodly ones. By having that open communication line with our husbands, it keeps our thoughts in check....you know since they are so great at staying rational in our very emotion/irrational world. Plus, they are our wonderful supporters. :)

4. Finding ways to Enjoy Life is definitely a challenge, but worth it. By trying to at least make the effort to enjoy the things you do is one more link to making it through. I find that there are several aspects to this which are; staying busy, planning fun events, and enjoying hobbies. With my job, I can work as little or as much as I want (kinda), but when I find myself not working as much or having too much down time, that's when my thoughts go haywire. As women, we all can relate to that, right. I start to wallow in my self pity. So if I make sure I work plenty each week, I don't have time to go off to shana-self-pity-land. Another thing that really helps is to have special things planned so I have something fun to look forward to. A trip, or event, or whatever to get excited about. Recently Cody and I decided to take a weekend trip to Austin, we brought our bikes so we could bike the trails and we even went kayaking down the river. Then on our way home stopped in San Marcus at the Outlet mall and got some great deals! Gotta love that! Soon I hope to visit my longtime friends in Tennessee, Lindsay and Carrie. It does cost money to go on trips but there are also ways to work around it and save money. Having something to LOOK FORWARD TO helps get me through this WAITING time. And lastly, I think sometimes we feel too stressed out, too emotional, or we lost our interests in the things we used to love. Whatever it might be, our hobbies get pushed to the waste side. Keeping up with these might be just what we need. We can even ask God to give us that love back for whatever it is that we're good at. With the weather being so nice lately, I find that I really enjoy gardening, it gets my mind of the hard stuff, and I just dig and plant away.

5. Having a great Support system has also really helped me. My friend and I came to a point in our journey where we were ready and really needed a support group. I know "support groups" sound so weird, like they are only for really bad-off people or infertile people. And sometimes women don't want to be labeled that, surely they will get pregnant soon. And for some, they do. But after a year or two of going through this it's healthy to have other friends going through it too. My friend and I finally found a GRACE group, as it's called, that meets one time a month. And it is so encouraging to go. We have speakers that share their testimony, journey, and how they got through it. We have prayer time and we share prayer requests which are optional. It's very warm, inviting, and non-intimidating. And I've meet some sweet women that I now call my friend. No one wants to go through this journey alone. Even if you think you're not ready for a group or have no desire to go to one, (it's not every one's thing, everyone copes differently) it's at least good to share your thoughts and get to know others that are going through the same thing. Having that support (aside from my husband) has kept me somewhat sane. Romans 12:1 "That is that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each others faith."

I may share all this as if I do it all so well. Well, I don't, it is my challenge to myself too. It all sounds good on paper and in my head, but I still have hard moments and hard days. But I have noticed the joy that comes in those little moments from time in the Word, a good workout, a new potted plant, a great conversation with my husband, a special dinner on a trip, and a good cry with a friend. It's THESE things that remedy my soul.